I feel that I like a parasite, right now, I live on my parents’ bodies, in future I will live on someone’s.

Until now, I still curl up in my dream and don’t want to open my eyes to see the world around me, actually I’m refusing to grow up, refusing accept that I’m an adult now.

In my mind, I have no concept for my life, I just like living in a fairy world, parents will never die, friends will always young. I like a flower live in a greenhouse, I can’t bear a little hurt from outside, I can’t live without my parents, I can’t bear my friends’ leaving. I live in my dream, don’t want to wake up.

Maybe someday someone who can tell me something like this: wake up, you are a grown man, look the people around you, your parents are older, your friends have grown up now, and so do you, everything is change now.

Then, I open my eyes hardly, and look around, I feel confuse, and helpless. Why? Why? Why? Why is the growth of childhood asked for such like this?

And at last I ask myself: who I am? Where I came from? Where I’m going? What is I want to do? I know I’ll spend a long time to find the answers, and I know if I find out the answers. I will be myself. A person who really grow up.

[em11][em11][em11]

Dear burning,

Reading your post, I could feel the burning heart inside your chest. To be honest, I sort of am having the same feelings as you do even at an older age than yours. The pains we must undergo teach us how to grow up, not merely make us grow up. Just few years ago, when I was only a college boy trying so hard to work out all those mysteries that puzzle me only only in my dreams but also during the waking hours, I realised to grow up meant independence whether finacial or spiritual, from external help or influence, whether this idea was applied to a man or a woman.

Today, I still hold this belief that without being a person living and thinking over life's problems totally on his or her own, he or she has not grown up yet. That's why there are very childish people at 80, though not keeping a young heart themselves, and such mature characters at their tender ages of 12 and 22. If you open the books telling us stories about the great personages in the past, you will find ample exampls of this.

We young people do have to wake up early and say to ourselves that a day's value can be completely ruined by sleeping it away. So with our lifetime. Wake up and start our own life at the early dawn. Even it feel so lonesome in the half darkness on our way ahead, always bear in mind this is the time when the Sun is rising from the horison and we will be the first to see it!

Charlie

Dear Burning,

Reading your post was such an enjoyment but still I could hardly resist my smiling, smiling from my bosom. The growing pain that you are now undergoing is such a splendid wonderful experience in my eyes. You will never know how much I envy you young guy and yet you said you fear to be growing up. If only I could give up everything I have in this world to exchange the lost youth no matter how many pains I have to bear.

To be growing up is something independent of human will, will you nill you, you will grow. I believe you are aware that you cannot be always under the wings of you parents, you have to be independent sooner or later and bear the hardship in life. Look, even a tiny silkworm can stand up the pains of casting off its skins for seven times through out its short life; so does a tadpole or a pupa. However, after all those pains a tadpole will be transformed into a frog; a pupa will be changed into a beautiful butterfly … So what are you fearing about young guy? You will be turned from a childish teenager into a vital young man or a young lady. Your horizon widened and your mind broadened.

Be brave and face up to the difficulties in life with courage!

Jeannie

[此贴子已经被作者于2005-12-13 9:12:32编辑过]

Dear Charlie:

Though your words I can feel that I’m not the only person who have a confuse style. Around myself there are so many guys who have the same feeling as me. Before this I never think of myself at all, and I didn’t realized I am an adult now. How can a grown man dosen’t think about himself like this.

A Saturday morning I changed my minds, when I woke up some special thing spark in my mind, suddenly I asked myself: why I’m here? What I’m doing now? I can’t get the answers. About my life, my future I have no ideas about them. To an existed person it’s terrible, if you don’t have any ideas about what you will do, then, you can do nothing successfully.

Since I entered the university, I didn’t do anything right (maybe), I didn’t get any good grades, I felt depressed, even I wanted to stop my study. But the truth is, I’m an adult now, I have responsibilities for myself, for my parents, even for others. I’m grown up now.

So,maybe someday someone will teach me once more and tell me that I earned looking out at my future. That, because of my hard work and perseverance, I will become competent in everything I attempt to do.

That morning I realized something and I wrote it down, I hope someone share it with me, so ,Charlie: thank you![em07]

Dear burning,

Hey, burning, you are growing up as a mature person!

Best wishes

Charlie

Dear Jeanni:

Thank you very much,about the growth I think I have a right attitude now.If a pupa will be changed into a beautiful butterfly after stand the great pains, I think I will be the butterfly in the future.

The most terrible thing is not the growth or the old age, it's our hearts,we must keep a young heart to face everything,everyone around us.Do you know a soup opera which name is 《似水年华》acted by huanglei, I like it very much,like these ideas about the life,love,and growth .

So, Jeanni thank you one more time, in my life I will meet many kinds of people, and they will give me many ideas about my life, my study, or other things else,I'm so glad that I have met them.

Hi dear Burning,

Thank you for your encouragement but I feel very sorry for not able to reply in time because I could not open your message till now! I don’t think I am qualified to give any advice to any young guys, all my wishes are to be your big friend for I am much elder than most of the forum friends here.

I didn’t get a chance to have college education when I was young; I started learning this language very late and all by myself, you cannot imagine! Eh? All my English knowledge is gained from radio and television and from books. Now you understand why I love young people so much and why I envy your campus life! You are right to say that age is not the knot of the matter, everyone is getting old sooner or later. Some people are old at their twenties; some are still young at their eighties. Do you agree?

Cherish your golden age before it fades away.

With all the best wishes!

Jeannie

Hi.dear Jeannie:

It dosen't matter that you reply my message late!

I'm so admire you that you can learn english so well by yourself.It's cool! You are a strong-willed person I think,that something I really lack of!

Jeannie,when you lost somethingh,at the same time you must be gained soemthing.

I really agree with you the iadea :Some people are old at their twenties; some are still young at their eighties.And which one you are?

[em01]

Dear Burning,

I think I am the sort of people whose heart is always young and I will never stop learning till the last minute of my life!

Perhaps it would be more accurate to the point if I say: I have to give up something in order to obtain something more important to life.

Jeannie

Dear Jeannie:

Yes,I have the same idea as you,and I will do it.Now I'm learn how to write in english or in chinese,I like chinese literature,but I don't mean some day I will be a writress.I want to write something to myself.When I old I will have something to read and remember my old days,that would be keep me feel young.

I want to leave something when I still alive,so I will work harder and harder!

Burning

[em10]